Sunday, November 22, 2009

Transgender Day of Remembrance

Charlotte Gender Alliance hosted the Transgender Day of Remembrance observance at The Charlotte Lesbian & Gay Community Center Friday, November 20th. I don't normally post my text of my remarks, but decided to make an exception.




As you have heard, ceremonies similar to this one were held around the world today and at this hour in Greensboro, Asheville and Charlotte. It is right and fitting for us to honor our sisters and brothers who have paid the ultimate price, only for being who they are.

These are more than names on a piece of paper. They are sons, daughters, friends and coworkers.

As we honor them, we honor anyone who has been stereotyped and marginalized. In the struggle for human dignity, our ultimate battle is for hearts and minds. The first victory lies within our own heart and mind.

As we seek a united LGBT community, we need to know that people can be different from us without being wrong. It is what we think of ourselves that controls our potential, not what others think we should be. We are today, the person we decided to be yesterday.

We see these names and may wonder, what defines a person’s life? Certainly our lives are not defined by sexual orientation or gender identity. The real measure of our life is what we do with our life.

You will notice the words on our banner, “Diversity will not only be respected; it will be honored.” This precept is at the heart of everything Charlotte Gender Alliance represents.

If there is to be a better future, we must disturb the present. If there is a crisis within the LGBT community, and I believe there is, it is a crisis of the heart. The task with which we are charged is to build bridges between those segments of society which have known only isolation and loneliness.

If we speak eloquently of the quest for human dignity but lack the courage to put words into action, aren’t they no more than empty words?

If we cannot grant others that dignity which we would claim for ourselves, do we not do an injustice to ourselves and others?

We may wake up each morning wondering if this is the day that our true self will become apparent and if we will be the next to be judged as worthy of violence.

There are people in this room who have lost everything they had in order to be all they were meant to be. The miracle is in learning that our own dignity is worth the price.

Many of us spend a lifetime trying conform to what others think we should be, rather than who we were intended to be. There eventually comes a time when the need to be a real person takes precedence over all else. There comes that defining moment when we must take off the mask and become genuine. Before we can give the world our best, we must first give ourselves our best. We learn that it really is okay to be who we are, no matter who we are.

It is in these defining moments when we learn how to live, rather than to merely survive, when we feel that spark of hope that lies within each of us and come to the realization that our lives have a higher purpose than we ever dreamed.

Tonight we stand upon the shoulders of those who have paved the way for us. Some day people will gather and speak of the progress we made, or the lack of it.

History will be our final judge but above all, may no person have reason to ask, “Why did you wait so long to live?”

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