Afternoons with Joyce

There is a book titled 'Tuesdays With Morrie', the lessons learned by a former student as his professor battles ALS, I find myself thinking about someday writing 'Afternoons With Joyce'.

I met Joyce several months ago during one of my marathon days of coffee and writing. We struck up a conversation and became fast friends. Joyce is originally from London, survived The Blitz and is a wonderful conversationalist. Our topics range from world affairs to cooking, to child rearing. She either waits for me, or I wait for her, depending on who gets there first. She's older than I am, which is saying a lot. I find her intellect so refreshing. I've enjoyed getting to know her daughter and grandchildren.

She spends summers in Canada with her husband and will be leaving within the next couple weeks. We will keep in touch and I will do something special for her when she comes back to Charlotte next fall to spend winter with her daughter. She is healthy and I pray that continues well into the future

Certain things put life into perspective. I spent a lifetime planning my transition. There were all the years of planning and worry, the electrolysis, counseling, a number of surgeries and all the losses so many of us endure. Then I realized what it was all about, and it's really pretty simple. The 'Afternoons With Joyce' were all I ever wanted. I mean that in the sense of living a normal life, having friends, church activities and all the things that give life meaning. Has it been worth it? You betcha.


My good friend, and favorite hairdresser, Swooz Glenn, got to know Charlotte Mayor Anthony Foxx during her own outreach work. She had her photo made with His Honor this past Monday. I told her I wanted to put it in my blog and she said that was cool. If you are close to Charlotte and want a good hair stylist who is a wonderful person, let me know and I will connect you with Swooz.

I'm doing more public speaking events these days, something I dearly love. This past Friday, I did a presentation at the Southern Organization for Human Services conference in Charlotte. It's important to speak to the helping professionals on LGBT issues. Their attendance is indicative of their own commitment to diversity. A social worker often asks what to do if a client has LGBT issues. My answer is to remember the limitations of your own knowledge and to be aware of your resources. Many of us seek multiple therapists before finding someone who has even heard of the SOC or is knowledgeable in hormone therapy.

I don't take many photos these days. A common theme I have observed is that before going full time, we often take all the photos we can. It's sort of like a validation of who we are. Once post transition, that need for validation is no longer there. Living one's life is it's own validation. Anyway, I took a photo before the conference Friday. I'm not fond of it, but several friends said I seem so content and happy. When we are able to not worry how we look in each photo, life is much less stress filled. For what it's worth, the photo is below.